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Nothing is more manly than a head full of useless information.  It’s used to break the silence in an awkward first date with that stripper you convinced that you were hung like a dictator sitting on an ocean of oil who won’t share it with the Americans and wealthier than the Americans when they take it anyway.  It can be used to spark lively and entertaining man conversation down the pub and, if you have a website dedicated to all things manly, you’ll forever be revered as a genius when you publish them and share your manly knowledge and women will want you to touch them in their underwear regions.  Probably.

Here are some true facts about Beer

Oktoberfest girls, cleavage and lesbo lip action. We should need no other reasons why beer is awesome

Among the Buganda people of Uganda, the widows of a deceased king have the honour of drinking beer in which the dead king’s entrails have been cleaned.

Budweiser beer was named after a town in Czechoslovakia.

Heineken beer’s foam is supposed to last five minutes.

The substance that gives red wine and dark beer its color is said to have a positive effects on cholesterol and blood pressure.

On average, Guinness sells 7 million glasses of beer a day.

Germany has about 1300 breweries, producing over 5000 varieties of beer.

On average, Guinness sells 7 million glasses of beer a day. Like a beer Capri Sun.

If you collect beer bottles your are a labeorphilist. And a virgin who belongs in the AA.

Arnold of Soissons, an 11th century bishop, brewed beer and encouraged locals to drink it instead of water for its health benefits (because it was boiled and thus sterilized from pathogens).

Here are some not-so-true facts about Beer

Beer gives you super powers, like the ability to slur your speech and walk like a new born deer without putting any effort into it.  It also gives you the ability to hold an erection while doing a fat chick.  Not even the smell of her gravy flavoured sweat can get rid of a beer induced lob on*.

Alcohol free beer is for big gay vaginas.

Irish people are like beer MacGuyvers.  We can make a carbonated 5% proof glass of beery goodness out of anything.  Potatoes, paper clips and lolly pop sticks and pipe cleaners and a blast welder make the best stuff.  Humming the MacGuyver theme tune while brewing increases manliness ten fold.

Beer is the greatest detoxing substance known to man.  When you’ve had a skinful and you vomit all over the side of a parked Garda car, that’s actually the demons and kebab leaving your body, leaving you clean once again.

*All the more reason to drink responsibly