Two Boobs Good, Four Boobs Better!

US supercar manufacturer Hennessey have produced a car that is set to rival the pant wettingly fast Bugatti Veyron – The Venom.

The first model produced is already on its way to the proud owner in the United Arab Emirates, direct from the Silverstone workshop.

The Venom is based on a Lotus Elise. However, while it looks like the Lotus, the Venom only uses the same windscreen, doors, roof, floor, dash and trim. Hennessey has developed its own all-new front and rear subframes and suspension, while the new bodywork is made from carbon fibre and has an adjustable rear wing.

Under the bonnet, the Venom boasts the same LS9 V8 that powers the Corvette ZR1. The entry-level car produces 725bhp, which is a far cry from the 98bhp my Nissan produces, on a good day, down hill with the wind behind it.  Twin-turbo versions which develop either 1,000bhp or an incredible 1,200bhp are available. The drive is transmitted to the road via the same six-speed manual gearbox as fitted to a Ford GT.

Weighing just 1,220kg, the top-spec car will sprint from 0-62mph in just 2.9 seconds and hit 260mph flat out. And that’s using US-spec 93 octane fuel! A bespoke set of KW dampers and carbon ceramic brakes keep the car on the road. And the price?

This top-spec car costs €815,000.

It’s cheaper than the nearly €1.2m you’d spend on a new Veyron, but still if you have that kind of money, you’d spring for the original, wouldn’t you?

Besides, you’d have cunts like me leaving notes on the windscreen saying “Nice Lotus, tossbag”