What the crowd should have done after 2 minutes
1. Drink my mother’s piss.
2. Sit in somone elses shit for a day and a half.
3. Kill myself.
4. Let George Hook cum on my face.
5. Listen to Ray D’Arcy for an entire day.
6. Wank off my boss.
7. The Leaving Cert.
8. Finger a badger’s arse.
9. Watch ‘Naked Camera’.
10. Jedward. Orally & Anally.
A fairly conclusive list I think.
I didn’t even have a ticket for the gig tonight. I wouldn’t have bought a Guns N’Roses ticket if it was 1990 for fuck’s sake. Why on earth would you want to see some botoxed cunt with ginger dreadlocks doing karaoke versions of some shit old songs from 25 years ago anyway?
Anyone who complains about the gig – and you know that they will – needs to have their head kicked in.
Axl Rose has been doing this shit for about 20 years now. And still, people are stupid enough to fork out 60 quid or whatever disgrace of a price they paid to see him do it all over again. Late in Leeds, booed off. Late in Reading, booed off. What makes you think he’ll drag his fat, spandex clad, 80′s throwback arse out of the brothel in order to get on stage in time in Dublin?
If you want to hear Sweet Child O’Mine, then save your hard earned money and go to any shithole Dublin suburban superpub on a Thursday night and listen to ‘Toe The Line’ or ‘The Frenzy’ or whatever bunch of kids are playing it there for free.
They’ll do a better job, and you won’t be charged 7 quid for a pint either.
So.
What would YOU rather do than go to a Guns N Roses gig?
Or, if you were actually AT the gig, on a scale of 1-10, how much of a spastic are you?
I love it when you just pop up like this.
I’d rather read Twink’s memoirs while trying not to vomit up my own small intestine.